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Global Warming

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 8:19 pm
by Telo
Time to get that Rickenbacker;

Image

Forget global warming . . .

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 8:35 pm
by Nick
.

The real menace to our society is BREAD!!
  1. More than 98 percent of convicted felons are bread eaters.
  2. Fully HALF of all children who grow up in bread-consuming households score below average on standardized tests.
  3. In the 18th century, when virtually all bread was baked in the home, the average life expectancy was less than 50 years; infant mortality rates were unacceptably high; many women died in childbirth; and diseases such as typhoid, yellow fever and influenza ravaged whole nations.
  4. More than 90 percent of violent crimes are committed within 24 hours of eating bread.
  5. Bread is made from a substance called "dough." It has been proven that as little as one pound of dough can be used to suffocate a mouse.The average UK citizen eats more bread than that in one month!
  6. Primitive tribal societies that have no bread exhibit a low occurrence of cancer, Alzheimer's, Parkinson's disease and osteoporosis.
  7. Bread has been proven to be addictive. Subjects deprived of bread and given only water to eat begged for bread after only two days.
  8. Bread is often a "gateway" food item, leading the user to "harder" items such as butter, jelly, peanut butter and even cold meat!
  9. Bread has been proven to absorb water. Since the human body is more than 90 percent water, it follows that eating bread could lead to your body being taken over by this absorptive food product, turning you into a soggy, gooey bread-pudding person.
  10. Newborn babies can choke on bread.
  11. Bread is baked at temperatures as high as 400 degrees Fahrenheit! That kind of heat can kill an adult in less than one minute.
  12. Most UK bread eaters are utterly unable to distinguish between significant scientific fact and meaningless statistical babbling.

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 9:25 pm
by ljs
Man, you needs loadsa bread for a Chelsea guitar.

BTW is it true that the only thing you can play on a Chelsea guitar is the blues?

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 9:36 pm
by Magna Carter
No.... you can play Russian folk too.....

Re: Global Warming

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 10:06 pm
by sahona
[quote="Shard"]Time to get that Rickenbacker;

Always fancied a semi-solid.

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 11:53 pm
by ljs
Ooh is this a play on words
's semi-solid
No 's hard. Shard
Oh please yerselves..

Planks or boxes

Posted: Mon Feb 18, 2008 7:16 pm
by spuddy
A Gretsch always appealed - or is it a brand of bottled beer ? I got a Gibson semi which I only pick up once a year to play a jazz chord. Which reminds me of the Stevie Wonder concert in Tokio. Fan repeatedly asked for a jazz chord and Stevie tried an assortment ( insert authentic stuff that includes sus and min 11 etc). Eventually fan says, "No, no. I jazz chord to say I love you"

Posted: Mon Feb 18, 2008 8:37 pm
by sahona
My grolch had a bigsby, but I necked it and went bluesy
More wine, skip. I'm think I'm coming to.

Posted: Mon Feb 18, 2008 9:57 pm
by chakalo
jazz chord... :D :D took me a while Spuddy..velly good.